it's not done yet... pologies, but w/e, figgered I'd put up some, get the rest up whenever I get around to it. Been pretty busy.
-R
2.12.09
story? not sure if I threw this up already or not, oh well
Her smile lit up the room. Every time I saw her, that’s the first thing I noticed. When no one else was looking I couldn’t help myself, I had to see her smile. That’s when I decided that no matter what, I had to make her happy. Any romantic will tell you that their love’s happiness is the most important thing, but for me, it was special, that smile was all that mattered in my life. We became friends easily, I’m good at making people smile, and she liked how happy I always was around her. I approached a couple of her friends, asking about relationships and boyfriends in the past, doing my research so that I wouldn’t hurt her the same way someone else had, learning from their mistakes. She was kinda seeing this guy who I knew, a real asshole, and she knew it too, so I waited. It got back to her that he was sleeping with 3 other girls while trying to tell her she was the only one for him. That was too much, and I was there when she was sad because it was so much fun. That was the worst time for me, with her unsmiling, even for me, I couldn’t handle things, I had to make it better. I started giving her flowers, just to see a grin at how silly I was being. From flowers I gave her what she wanted, books, movies, things I was recommending to her, things she needed. One day she stopped me and asked, what I thought I was trying to do. My answer was really simple. I was trying to make her smile again. I should have told her a long time ago. Just that simple answer sparked her lips, and they matched my dreams. I could not help myself, and just stared at her, she’s so beautiful. She asked
“like this?”
I had no words for her, there was nothing I could say to match the happiness flooding through my veins. I answered her the only way I could, I took her hand and placed it to my lips, feeling every line and rough callous. Kissing every sign of her life on her palms, I moved to her wrist, and felt her pulse beat against my tongue, sending shivers through me. I knew what I was doing, but I wanted her to know too, I looked at her, and she had stopped smiling, her mouth was slightly parted with her breath slipping out between moist lips as she stared at me.
“Yes…”
she whispered as I took a step closer and slipped my arm around her waist. Pulling her close was made easier by her eagerness to be pressed up against me. I looked around her room, there was a double bed in the corner, and a couch pushed up against the wall. She must have seen the look in my eyes, because she took a step back, flashed me a smile from heaven, and slowly started unbuttoning her shirt, one button at a time. Revealing a little skin and then a little more, until I could not contain myself and I moved forward. She danced back away from me, placing a delicate hand on my chest to keep me away. She pushed me back and I tripped over the couch, flopping down into the corner. She giggled and turned around, flipping her shirt down so I could see the smooth skin of her shoulders and back, the plain black of her bra in contrast with her golden body. I figured I was dreaming, that there was no way the girl I had been wanting for months was here with me, and that she would be mine alone. My eyes followed her shirt to the ground, and then slid back up her body, absorbing every inch and ounce of her. She turned around and gave me a shy little smile, sparking a huge one of my own. Giving her the admiration she deserved with my eyes I stood up and stepped close. Feeling her skin with my fingers, being as delicate as I could I traced small designs all over her bare back and arms. I let my fingers fall down and pulled my own shirt off, needing to feel her with more than my hands. I lowered my lips to her collarbone, kissing and nibbling on the bone structure beneath her soft skin. Placing little wet kisses up to her neck, where I pressed my lips against her life veins and held her close, feeling her heart beat against my chest and mouth at the same time. My fingers spread wide on her lower back and pulled her hips into mine, feeling her press up against me all the way down to her leg wrapped around mine. I returned the favor with my left arm, locking it around her hips, and picked her up till our faces were directly in front of each other. I felt my heart speed up as I looked deeply into her eyes. I had never noticed before, brown tinged with streaks of green, patterning them to depict her emotions. I saw her sadness covered by a mask, I could see her hope and desire for something she could hold on to and never have to leave. I felt my throat tighten and I couldn’t look away, and then I saw her smile again, and I understood why her smile was the only one I needed. She had been so sad that her happiness had real value, that any time she smiled, it was all of her joy expressed at once. I wanted to make her eyes smile forever. So I kissed them. I kissed every part of her face over and over, carefully avoiding her lips when she tried to catch mine. i felt her hands on my face, her elbows on my chest, she pulled my head straight in front of her and leaned forward. I felt the instant our lips touched in my whole body, I could taste her love, her satisfaction, her desire, and her happiness on my tongue, and I could not help but share it with her. As my tongue slipped inside her lips and danced along the edges of her tongue I felt her melt against my body, and it was more than I could handle. I stepped to the bed without removing my lips from hers, opening my eyes to stare at her face, so open and closed at the same time. I placed her down on the bed, leaning over her and slowly placed my lips back on her neck, right next to her jawline, I could feel her breathe as her chest lifted up against mine and then receded, both of our skins sticking to each other, trying to hold on to contact a little longer. I moved lower, placing my mouth against the edge of her bra, slipping along her curves. Lining her front with a row of little wet imprints from my lips tracing from her neck down to the button on her jeans.
“like this?”
I had no words for her, there was nothing I could say to match the happiness flooding through my veins. I answered her the only way I could, I took her hand and placed it to my lips, feeling every line and rough callous. Kissing every sign of her life on her palms, I moved to her wrist, and felt her pulse beat against my tongue, sending shivers through me. I knew what I was doing, but I wanted her to know too, I looked at her, and she had stopped smiling, her mouth was slightly parted with her breath slipping out between moist lips as she stared at me.
“Yes…”
she whispered as I took a step closer and slipped my arm around her waist. Pulling her close was made easier by her eagerness to be pressed up against me. I looked around her room, there was a double bed in the corner, and a couch pushed up against the wall. She must have seen the look in my eyes, because she took a step back, flashed me a smile from heaven, and slowly started unbuttoning her shirt, one button at a time. Revealing a little skin and then a little more, until I could not contain myself and I moved forward. She danced back away from me, placing a delicate hand on my chest to keep me away. She pushed me back and I tripped over the couch, flopping down into the corner. She giggled and turned around, flipping her shirt down so I could see the smooth skin of her shoulders and back, the plain black of her bra in contrast with her golden body. I figured I was dreaming, that there was no way the girl I had been wanting for months was here with me, and that she would be mine alone. My eyes followed her shirt to the ground, and then slid back up her body, absorbing every inch and ounce of her. She turned around and gave me a shy little smile, sparking a huge one of my own. Giving her the admiration she deserved with my eyes I stood up and stepped close. Feeling her skin with my fingers, being as delicate as I could I traced small designs all over her bare back and arms. I let my fingers fall down and pulled my own shirt off, needing to feel her with more than my hands. I lowered my lips to her collarbone, kissing and nibbling on the bone structure beneath her soft skin. Placing little wet kisses up to her neck, where I pressed my lips against her life veins and held her close, feeling her heart beat against my chest and mouth at the same time. My fingers spread wide on her lower back and pulled her hips into mine, feeling her press up against me all the way down to her leg wrapped around mine. I returned the favor with my left arm, locking it around her hips, and picked her up till our faces were directly in front of each other. I felt my heart speed up as I looked deeply into her eyes. I had never noticed before, brown tinged with streaks of green, patterning them to depict her emotions. I saw her sadness covered by a mask, I could see her hope and desire for something she could hold on to and never have to leave. I felt my throat tighten and I couldn’t look away, and then I saw her smile again, and I understood why her smile was the only one I needed. She had been so sad that her happiness had real value, that any time she smiled, it was all of her joy expressed at once. I wanted to make her eyes smile forever. So I kissed them. I kissed every part of her face over and over, carefully avoiding her lips when she tried to catch mine. i felt her hands on my face, her elbows on my chest, she pulled my head straight in front of her and leaned forward. I felt the instant our lips touched in my whole body, I could taste her love, her satisfaction, her desire, and her happiness on my tongue, and I could not help but share it with her. As my tongue slipped inside her lips and danced along the edges of her tongue I felt her melt against my body, and it was more than I could handle. I stepped to the bed without removing my lips from hers, opening my eyes to stare at her face, so open and closed at the same time. I placed her down on the bed, leaning over her and slowly placed my lips back on her neck, right next to her jawline, I could feel her breathe as her chest lifted up against mine and then receded, both of our skins sticking to each other, trying to hold on to contact a little longer. I moved lower, placing my mouth against the edge of her bra, slipping along her curves. Lining her front with a row of little wet imprints from my lips tracing from her neck down to the button on her jeans.
What's good!
checking out them email-blog posts. That'll keep it easier to update this shizzz. What's good ninjaahhs!
-R
-R
1.12.09
poetry notes
there's a poetry contest? maybe? money? maybe? doubt I'll get anything but it can't hurt to throw my poem in there right? maybe? who knows. But this is a rough draft of something I wrote, figured they'd appreciate a love poem more than the stuff I usually write so I tried my hardest (if anyone is interested: http://www.poetry.com/poetry-contests/ check it out):
If eyes could taste as sweet as yours,
I would never need to eat.
But could feast on sight of you,
a privilege to sit and stare.
Drinking you in.
Like a man parched for beauty, instead
filled with sight.
No equal earth angel, beauteous in my eye
beheld not for love but hope,
grace, wonder, a smile.
Synonyms to my eyes, a strange singularity.
Love does not create beauty.
We are but dragons, and our beauty creates love.
Jealousy spawns not from possession, but from loss,
a hoardless, mindless, beardless beast,
to wander alone, no glint or glitter
I want the world to know, not
of my happiness, but of that which creates it.
My beauty.
the sole sparkle in one half closed eye and barely recognized
with too much sleep.
Stare into mine, and find my hope, my troubles, my smile
not all of them are mine, but to give freely,
and envy not.
We cannot lose a beast so great,
but we can hide it in a cave,
send knights by day to slay it,
and mourn the charred remains of hate we find
crumpled on a carpeted floor somewhere in Brooklyn.
As simply as you cannot argue
logically with faith,
you cannot rationalize with any weight of heart.
Measure well that quality of dreams,
because you cannot consciously cheat Anubis
I cannot know what I must gather,
so instead I am forced to go pick on a forked road,
I will take neither path nor fork, but
sit.
until my head is full and belly empty
for want of thanks to give
I'll trade away my eyes
to keep my memories.
You mean that much to me, I can't explain
why because
I tell you sometimes
in the dark
and light and
cold.
You keep me warm,
you give me hope,
darling, looking in my eyes while I stare at you,
that sparkle dancing is from you, who already know.
You are the dreams worth having,
that make my eyes crinkle for smiling.
Thank you. You already know but read it one more time at least,
and let my naked letters dance across your eyelids when you need my voice,
and I have none.
I love you.
If eyes could taste as sweet as yours,
I would never need to eat.
But could feast on sight of you,
a privilege to sit and stare.
Drinking you in.
Like a man parched for beauty, instead
filled with sight.
No equal earth angel, beauteous in my eye
beheld not for love but hope,
grace, wonder, a smile.
Synonyms to my eyes, a strange singularity.
Love does not create beauty.
We are but dragons, and our beauty creates love.
Jealousy spawns not from possession, but from loss,
a hoardless, mindless, beardless beast,
to wander alone, no glint or glitter
I want the world to know, not
of my happiness, but of that which creates it.
My beauty.
the sole sparkle in one half closed eye and barely recognized
with too much sleep.
Stare into mine, and find my hope, my troubles, my smile
not all of them are mine, but to give freely,
and envy not.
We cannot lose a beast so great,
but we can hide it in a cave,
send knights by day to slay it,
and mourn the charred remains of hate we find
crumpled on a carpeted floor somewhere in Brooklyn.
As simply as you cannot argue
logically with faith,
you cannot rationalize with any weight of heart.
Measure well that quality of dreams,
because you cannot consciously cheat Anubis
I cannot know what I must gather,
so instead I am forced to go pick on a forked road,
I will take neither path nor fork, but
sit.
until my head is full and belly empty
for want of thanks to give
I'll trade away my eyes
to keep my memories.
You mean that much to me, I can't explain
why because
I tell you sometimes
in the dark
and light and
cold.
You keep me warm,
you give me hope,
darling, looking in my eyes while I stare at you,
that sparkle dancing is from you, who already know.
You are the dreams worth having,
that make my eyes crinkle for smiling.
Thank you. You already know but read it one more time at least,
and let my naked letters dance across your eyelids when you need my voice,
and I have none.
I love you.
30.11.09
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